{"product_id":"just-the-hose-pg","title":"Just The Hose","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“JOSH, DRINK.” \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eJosh stared at the hose. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“It tastes like pennies.” \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOh, look. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe sommelier has notes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOf course it tastes like pennies, Josh. It’s been baking across Mr. Williamson’s driveway since breakfast. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDrink it.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBecause going home for water meant Mom spotted you and suddenly you’re folding laundry until puberty.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eJosh took a sip. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eMade a face. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOhhhhh, no. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSteven saw it. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWe ALL saw it. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFive minutes ago Josh was qualified to jump a creek in a stolen shopping cart.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eNow? \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHis adventure clearance was under review.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eNobody feared rusty nails, concussions, or whatever lived in that abandoned shed. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBut gag at hose water? \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCongratulations, Josh. 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